3 Tips to Reduce Stress & Anxiety
Nervousness always kicks in for me before trying something new. Whether I’m starting a brand-new project or doing something unfamiliar, I get nervous—every time.
Recently, I was driving to a new restaurant in the city to meet some friends. Even with GPS giving me every turn, I still got lost. One wrong left turn, and I felt completely thrown off. As I sat in bumper-to-bumper rush hour traffic, running late, the negative self-talk started creeping in. My nervousness quickly spiraled into full-blown anxiety.
Understanding anxiety and how it affects stress:
According to the American Psychological Association, anxiety is “an emotion characterized by feelings of tension, worried thoughts, and physical changes.” When our stress response is triggered, anxious thoughts can show up—especially in moments when we feel unsafe, out of control, or pressured to perform.
Anxiety can impact how we manage stress in everyday life—from giving a presentation, to going on a first date, to simply navigating something new. While mild anxiety is normal, especially when we’re doing something new or important, those worried thoughts can start to feel overwhelming if they go unchecked. That’s why learning how to organize your thoughts during stressful moments is a key tool in stress management.
Here are three practical ways to organize anxious thoughts and get back to a place of calm:
1. Practice a go-to coping skill:
The first step in managing anxiety is to calm your nervous system. If you notice physical signs of stress—like a racing heart, sweating, or restlessness—try a simple coping strategy to help you feel more regulated.
Some effective coping skills for stress relief include:
Deep breathing: Focus on slow, intentional inhales and exhales until your body begins to relax.
Grounding with your senses: Name five things you can see, hear, or smell around you. This can safely shift your focus from anxious thoughts to your immediate surroundings.
If your anxious thoughts start to show up daily or interfere with your ability to function, it may be a sign of an anxiety disorder. Please know that seeking support from a licensed mental health professional is always encouraged and valid.
2. Do a self-check:
Once you’ve calmed your body, ask yourself honestly: What am I feeling anxious about?
While I was stuck in traffic, I asked myself that exact question. Out loud, I said:
"I hate not knowing where I’m going, and I don’t want to embarrass myself by being late."
Just saying that truth helped me understand what was really going on. My anxiety wasn't just about missing a turn—it was about feeling out of control, not being perfect, and feeling shame about it. When you name your thoughts clearly, you create room for self-compassion. Try writing them down or speaking them aloud, and notice how your mind softens once your feelings are heard.
3. Take action by getting grounded
Once you’re calm and clear on what’s causing your stress, the next step is grounding yourself with helpful thoughts or actions. What can you do right now that helps you feel more steady?
For me, that looked like making a mental list to remind myself of what I could control. My grounded list included:
I’m physically safe and able to drive.
I have plenty of gas in the car.
I can take a different route to the restaurant.
My friends will understand if I’m a little late.
By focusing on what was true and within reach, I created space to calm down and move forward—without spiraling into overwhelm.
When I was able, I even texted my friends and let them know I was turned around and would be a little late. Guess what—they were lost too! By communicating, I even managed to do something about my feelings of embarrassment—not just for me, but for all of my friends. After you’ve understood where your anxiety is coming from, let your self-compassion take over when creating a mentally grounded list. Remember that the feeling you’re feeling is temporary and that you are ultimately in control. When feeling anxious, remind yourself: this thought will pass, and there are so many things happening in that same moment that can help you feel safer, calmer, and more supported.
Y’all, having a healthy relationship with yourself, your feelings, and your thoughts takes work! But with practice—and with reminders from safe spaces like gmichelle.com—we can keep doing this work together.
How do you like to manage feelings of anxiety?
